7/1/11

My refrains


  • I am reluctant to play any sport that requires me to plan my wardrobe a day in advance.
  • I don't like to go to restaurants where the waiters are likely to be better dressed than me.
  • Children are a gift from god. But sometimes you wish they came with a gift receipt.
  • I worry that I can't be an artist as I am unable to conjure up vacuous ironies.
  • Every time I pass on making a donation for prostate cancer at the grocery checkout counter, I worry whether that's what will get me in the end. Did I just prove the previous statement wrong?
  • I don't understand why the menu at a restaurant is guarded as if it holds the secret recipes for their most famous dishes? No sooner are you done ordering, than the waiter quips: "Are you done with the menus sir? " Why? What's the rush? It's not like I am going to hold the menu hostage to get a free meal for my family: "Hold it right there mister! This meal is free or my infant drools all over this menu! She is teething as well, so don't play any games with me!" 
  • For the longest time, I used to believe that special forces had the same connotation as special kids or special olympics.  So I never understood why the army would want to have special forces units in the first place. And then when I heard that the Pentagon and CIA were using those special forces units to hunt down terrorists, I thought that was just plain cold and cruel. 

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